1.I'm Lost
Lord, here i am
i'm lost, i can't find my way
like adam and judas before me
i've gone astray
life is endlessly brief
and we languish in death throws within her
and i have no fight left in me
have mercy on me Lord, a sinner
2.Nothing Matters Anymore
after all of this we've been dismissed by those who prefer to
eat dirt
we've been gladly exempt we are racked with contempt
and we happily wish you this hurt
my skull is on fire with barbs and black spires
my synapses shriek in the flames
yet we reel with desire though chocked by coarse wire
we've been loosed by our raging disdain
i'm gone, God help me i'm done
nothing can stop me, i'm done
no fear no doubt i've bottomed out i've lost myself i'm letting
go
no pride no me i've set them free i've lost my mind and now i
know
no pain no death they're put to rest we leave them here we close
the door
no earth no man, now take my hand nothing matters anymore
oh the stage that we soil, the plans that we foil
the joke that we play on the world
and you drown in the oil, all wrapped up in the coils
crushed under the stones that you've hurled
still we march through the tombs through the darkness and gloom
and we shatter the columns of bone
and the world she breaks for the lives that she takes
she weeps as she dies all alone
no fear no doubt i've bottomed out i've lost myself i'm letting
go
no pride no me i've set them free i've lost my mind and now i
know
no pain no death they're put to rest we leave them here we close
the door
no earth no man, now take my hand nothing matters anymore
the world is a husk to be peeled back and torn
my body a shell that now breaks
how i long to escape from the chains that i've worn
and hasten my greatest escape
and when i breathe my very last
don't shed a tear for me
discard the body that once was my prison
for i'll have been set free
and when the trumpets call us home and i am no longer bedded by
pain
our tears will be forever dried for the author of life knows my
name
so we trample the hoards of the pointless and blank
we will die for the truth in our hearts
no force that exists will steal us from his hands
nothing will tear us apart
though the mirror is dull, the reflection obscured we look
beyond the obtuse
and the world weighs down, beating us to the ground
but her efforts are of little use
the annointed one has purchased our souls death is battered and
lifeless before me
the truth rains down for the children of Christ and the truth
has set us free
and through it all we rise when we fall
though the road grows more narrow before me
though we ache though we cry never break, never die
the one truth there is sets us free
3.Lost Connection With The Head
oh lord i'm sick of myself
i'd rather bury it than carry it
i'm desperate for help
and barely sentient means just being me
follow suit the destitute my modus operandi
a face that's marked by pallor means you're wasting away
so get a tan and raise your hands and take to feeling okay
no one enjoys the party when they're stricken with anemia
and i'm a shallow sinking surface simply screaming septicemia
peace of mind is hard to find
so i'm standing in line and feeling fine
aye me, sad hours seem long!
and even longer when you're numb
fading away and that's okay
cause life has me under her thumb
i'm languorously open ended
and the endings no good
i've been told to break the mold and i would if i could
but apathy is easier than caring at all
and the undulating nothingness means having a ball
incredibly impressive and bereft of concern
lobotomized and optimized and then i'm ready to burn
and i'm at war within myself and self is winning the fight
cause feeling like no one at all means feeling alright
sense of purpose has got me feeling worthless
and i'm fading away, but that's okay
aye me, sad hours seem long!
and even longer when you're numb
fading away and that's okay
cause life has me under her thumb
oh yeah, all right
i'm in a big fat cage and feeling free
that's okay , that's all right
cause that's all that's left of me
aye me, sad hours seem long!
and even longer when you're numb
fading away and that's okay
cause life has me under her thumb
oh yeah, all right
i'm in a big fat cage and feeling free
that's okay , that's all right
cause that's all that's left of me
goodbye, goodnight
that's all that's left of me
4.Regret Consumes Me
it must have been easier when we were younger
and the world takes place two feet outside of your head
then something expanded and you start to feel stranded
so you scramble outside of the skin that you shed
it must have been easier when the lights were brighter
and the girls were screaming your name
then the bulbs burn out and you're left in doubt
and everything starts to feel the same
you couldn't stand it i suppose
life comes and then life goes
some things nobody knows
some things nobody knows
it must have been easier to feel in control
you were so small and needed a way to feel big
so you took all you could and it felt pretty good
then suddenly you're aware of what you did
it must have been easier to be somebody we knew
or maybe you felt spent
suddenly you're gone and everything goes wrong
and no one knows just why you went
we couldn't stand you i suppose...
you couldn't stand it i suppose
life comes and then life goes
some things nobody knows
some things nobody knows
you couldn't stand it i suppose
life comes and then life goes
some things nobody knows
some things are easy some things aren't a breeze
some of my branches stretch out and bear fruit
some branches die when they freeze
and sometimes i think of you
you couldn't stand it i suppose
life comes and then life goes
some things nobody knows
some things nobody knows
you jumped from a plane that you thought would explode
and you slowly drift your way down
with the dead weight gone the plane flies on
the madness in flight, the safety of the ground
5.Out Of My Mind
you're being coy with me？
you were timorous and got me in the palm of your hand
i'm just an idiot wrecking my way to you
but i still get to be your man
out of my mind
there never was a method to my madness it's true
but i'm out of my mind for you
what drives a man to madness？
what makes a man come unglued？
what liberates the slaves of sadness？
it must be someone like you
i leave a mess in my wake and i call it mistakes
but you were puckering up and demure
now you wear my ring and so you got what it takes
to make me into something more and baby that's you're allure
out of my mind with what is the divinity that brings you to me
out of my mind
and my love is ever true so baby why not let the truth set you
free？
what drives a man to madness？
what makes a man come unglued？
what liberates the slaves of sadness？
it must be someone like you
what drives a man to madness？
what makes a man come unglued？
what liberates the slaves of sadness？
it must be someone like you
what drives a man to madness？
what makes a man come unglued？
what liberates the slaves of sadness？
it must be someone like you
6.Vehement
you talk so much that you must think
your tongue spools out from your brain
but those around you demand your wisdom
to combat the lowly inane
and oh how you make me hate the freedom of speech
because you use it like your throat sprung a leak
and actions do speak certainly
but since you won't pay attention shut your mouth and listen to
me
i've got to get myself to forget myself
the soapbox you stand on has got a few cracks
the horse that you ride is quite high
perhaps you're as wise as your words may suggest
or perhaps you wear a disguise
for all the wrong that you call to attention
some seems to have been misplaced
and since you speak so honestly
why don't you point your finger right back in your own face？
i've got to get myself to forget myself
Lord i hate the sin so much
and i love the sinner, i certainly do
but how will they know how to purge the evil
if i don't tell them what to do？
i've got to get myself to forget myself
7.The Great Emasculation
i now pronounce you man and life
without the bones that kept you from sagging like a sack of skin
a trash bag full of fluid that the man you used to be
is drowning in
the roles reversed we got confused
lost track of who we were
thought humility meant to be castrated
thought self-sacrifice meant losing all we were to her
hey, can someone say to me
love feels like freedom and not like slavery？
hey, i'm breaking down
the pieces of me getting lost in the cracks of her ground
and i thought a lot about being a robot
but i don't want to be alone
used to be a guy with big dreams and brains inside my head
now i'm licking boots instead of washing feet
now the man i was is dead
it's a lot of work when two people connect
thought love was a beautiful thing
but it feels like a shackle around my neck
feels a lot like suffocating
hey, can someone say to me
love feels like freedom and not like slavery？
hey, i'm breaking down
the pieces of me getting lost in the cracks of her ground
hey, i'm breaking down
the pieces of me getting lost in the cracks of her ground
and i thought a lot about being a robot
but i don't want to be alone
8.Shepherd No Sheep
forgive me children for i have sinned
i never asked you first
the way in which i wrote this song,
the pen which scribed the verse
i never stopped to think of you
each chord change, each refrain
was done so with you not in mind
the farthest from my brain
already gone and such a waste
will you please put me in my place？
it's not enough to just say the things you do
and i hate music because of you
being the conisourre you are, with all you listen to
you know exactly what we've done wrong and what we need to do
come to you before each note is ever written down
find out exactly what you want before we make a sound
already gone and such a waste
will you please put me in my place？
it's not enough to just say the things you do
and i hate music because of you
but i, in my arrogance
have gone my separate way
music is dead and so are we, and soon will come the day
when every single stupid song and everything online
will turn to dust, the moth, the rust, decay and wasted time
if i am honest, there's part of me that hopes it makes you sick
i hope you cannot stand to hear it, or bear the thought of it
i hope that tomorrow you'll curse our name
you'll drill it in the dirt
i hope you'll not come back to us
i hope it always hurts
but at Your feet i admit defeat
my work is now in Your hands
if they want to hear stupid music so very bad
they can start themselves a band
already gone and such a waste
will you please put me in my place？
it's not enough to just say the things you do
and i hate music because of you
9.Let There Be Raw
i'm nobody singing to nobody
so no one hears the things i say
i've seen what it means to be somebody
and i'd much rather fade away
we've been obstinate all along
we haven't given an inch
and when someone asks what it sounds like when you die
i'll tell them it sounds just like this
raw.......
take what you it is that you think you know
and trample it under your heels
no compromise no fear of death
this is how freedom feels
music is dead and you pretend it's alive
but we aren't living a lie
this is what it sounds like to embrace the truth
this is what it sounds like when you die
raw rock
10.I Think I'm Going To See You
madness is like love
it makes you see the world a different way
maybe love just helps you say the things that madness can't
convey
when an evil spirit leaves a man
it goes flying through the desert
looks for a place to stay and then comes back
and that's what's got me hiding out
from rapists thieves and perverts
the newsman telling me we're under attack
because the more the world puts in my mouth
the less i feel like chewing it
i found the way to madness and i'm opening the door
the more they say what's on my mind
the more i feel i'm losing it
they tell me what to care about and i don't care anymore
cause there's a hole in the fabric of my sanity
and it's getting big enough to see through
and on the other side of losing my mind
i think i'm going to see you
i pledge allegiance to myself
don't make much sense to me
and if freedom frees the idiots
i don't think i've been set free
with all the emphasis on money and guns
and looking out for number one
seems like clouds in my coffee
cause the world is a lady with a veil over her face
but i'm tearing it away because she's got something to hide
and all our hopes and dreams i fear have been badly misplaced
cause life means giving up yourself and i'm not afraid to die
there's a fire on the flag that makes you who you are
and i think my mask is starting to slip
and now that everythings breaking down
i think i'm getting a grip
there's a fire on the flag that makes you who you are
and i think my mask is starting to slip
and now that everythings breaking down
i think i'm getting a grip
the more the world puts in my mouth
the more i feel like throwing up
i've found the way to freedom and i'm opening the door
the more they tell me how to care
the more and more i'm giving up
afraid of God and life and death, and i'm not afraid anymore
there's a fire on the flag that makes you who you are
and i think my mask is starting to slip
and now that everythings breaking down
i think i'm getting a grip
there's a fire on the flag that makes you who you are
and i think my mask is starting to slip
and now that everythings breaking down
i think i'm getting a grip
there's a fire on the flag that makes you who you are
and i think my mask is starting to slip
and now that everythings breaking down
i think i'm getting a grip
there's a fire on the flag that makes you who you are
and i think my mask is starting to slip
and now that everythings breaking down
i think i'm getting a grip
11.Precursor
i used to believe in something
and something believed in me
but now i see i forced myself
cause believing in nothing is scary
now there's nothing left to lose
and we've been wearied and refused
i am an unbelieving wreck
will you please lift me by my neck？
how do i turn this into something i believe
when it's something i've been told and something i've been
taught？
how do i turn this into something that i need？
i'll be lavishly controlled and be someone that i'm not
make me believe
joy and suffering, good and evil
breathing and growing and life
it's all just a fluke, means nothing to me
and maybe nothing is all right
to give up my life to hold on to hope
to forfeit all of me
to believe that something must be true
and that truth will set us free
how do i turn this into something i believe
when it's something i've been told and something i've been
taught？
how do i turn this into something that i need？
i'll be lavishly controlled and be someone that i'm not
believing in love, believing in hope
surrendering all of my will
believing in nothing is scary
believing in something is scarier still
12.The Fear Of God
dear God, why should i think you're good
in a world that's falling apart？
the flags and lies picket signs raised high
the endless enveloping dark
and now here we sit, drifting further from you
two thousand years on their way out
and now i am here, and somehow i know you
still haunted by my fears and my doubts
just a man, just a vapor, just a waste of your space
all the good that i've done is in spite of myself
i'm not sure that i can look you in your face
when i finally set foot in your kingdom
dear God, what went wrong？
we hate ourselves, we hate our brother
we so desperately want to find our way
and all you say is 'love one another'
and little babies starve to death emaciated, out of breath
unfaithful wives make vows untrue, husbands beat them black and
blue
junkies vomit in the streets writhing, twitching in their skin
sell themselves to die some more, rotting from the outside in
parents steal the innocence, from their children, scared and
shaking
they drink away the guilt at night, brings quiet to the endless
aching
evil men boast on TV, swimming in a sea of wealth
while misery beds honest men, and lonely people kill themselves
and everyone cries out your name, as the world is raped by
selfishness
and no one knows the way to heaven, we only know the emptiness
the storm it rages in my heart, the endless empty roars in my
ears
my world is coming all apart, i've no strength left to dry my
tears
and through it all i hear your voice, breaking my heart,
breaking my will
calms the storm inside of my soul as you whisper 'peace, be
still...'
you place your hands around my heart, you quiet the emptiness in
me
a king that kneels, a God made a servant, you set the captives
free
you wait for me, a wretch of a man, no record of wrongs do you
keep
you are comfort when i mourn, you are strength when i am weak
Jesus Christ, the king of kings
though we ache though we cry, never break never die
we sing of His great love again and again
and His love reigns forever, and forevermore
forever and ever amen
13.Until We Meet Again
my dearest friend, if i sing you this song
will you hear it from up in heaven？
i'm still down here in this ugly place
but up there's where i'm heading
when they tell you i'm coming please wait for me
in front of the house that i'll live in
and when Jesus walks me up to the door
i can finally see you again
it's true that my heart was broken in two
on the day i said goodbye to you
and i carry an ache inside of my chest
until Jesus makes everything new
those that we loved that left before us must have been thrilled
beyond words
when you ran through the gates and into the kingdom
and up to the feet of my Lord
once sick and frail, once weak and pale
now made perfect and new
no more aching and crying, no more breaking and dying
finally home in the arms of who loves you
when you run and you play in the light of the Son
hold me in your heart and mind
i don't know how and i don't know when
but i'm leaving this cold place behind
how my heart aches to think of the day
when my faith shall finally be sight
when the crowds will part and cheer as i come
as i walk through toward the light
and my father, my love, my Jesus, my king
in his glory, seated on his throne
he'll take me in his arms as the crowds cheer and sing
and say 'well done child, welcome home'
and he'll walk me to the house that he built
with the father's love and the carpenters touch
and you'll run to me and i'll hold you again
my friend, i've missed you so much
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